We want our partner to be our biggest cheerleader. And for the most part, Redditor u/Appropriate-Pea-156 was exactly that.

She embraced her boyfriend the way he was, didn’t force him to make any changes, and was trying to make the best of their time together. But the guy had enough insecurity about his weight to go around for the both of them. Still, u/Appropriate-Pea-156 tried to make the relationship work.

It was when he started projecting his disappointment with himself outward and directing it at other people that she couldn’t take it any longer.

Image credits: Martin Vorel (not the actual photo)

Knowing how to support someone else in a healthy and balanced way is a common issue. According to clinical psychologist Dr. Carla Marie Manly, instead of blindly guessing what the other person wants and needs, be sure that you and your partner feel free to talk to each other about how you’re feeling.

“It’s important for the partner who is craving support to be specific about the issue at hand and exactly what would feel supportive,” she told Bustle. “For example, a partner might say, ‘I’m really stressed about work right now. I would love your support; It would feel so good if you went on a quiet walk with me (cuddled me, watched a movie with me, etc.).'”

However, as with everything in life, there are exceptions. While supporting your partner’s plans and dreams should be important to you, that doesn’t mean you have to go along with just about anything they want, especially if they’re doing something destructive. “Part of being in a healthy relationship is having hard conversations where we share our true thoughts, especially when our partner is doing something destructive,” Dr. Marisa Franco, a former professor with a PhD in counseling psychology, said.

As the story went viral and people expressed their support for OP, she provided even more info on the situation

Having a relationship is hard work. Partners have to make sacrifices for each other every once in a while. For example, maybe one person agrees to get up early and take the dog out so that their loved one who came back from work late can sleep in a bit. But experts say that ignoring all of your needs for the common good isn’t healthy.

“A relationship is about compromise to ensure that each party is getting their needs met to the extent that they can,” Franco explained. Instead of enduring a situation in which a person gets all of their needs met at the expense of the other who is constantly sacrificing, the second one should probably think about a (new) more balanced relationship.

At the end of the day, however corny it may sound, happiness comes from within. And this story is an excellent example of that. If you’re not content with yourself, you are the one who has to solve it.

Later, the author of the post said the relationship eventually ended

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